Writing practice: write a scene modeled on chapter 2 of the count of monte cristo
Sebastian ran with the energy of youth, propelled by excitement and exuberance mixed with apprehension. It had been four months since he left – the longest he’d been away from his now-ailing father. He hadn’t called to announce his return, and he was now moments away from his father’s house. But how would he find him – much worse than before? Had his sickness developed or abated? He told himself he’d check his expression and not indicate an observance of a dramatic change for the worse if there were one. He wanted this to be an unequivocally happy reunion, not one tinged with sadness.
He couldn’t recall how his feet brought him from train station to house, and he didn’t recall what he saw in the ten minutes he’d been running, but he arrived. There was an unfamiliar car in the driveway, and a window was open – “Whatever this means, at least someone’s home,” he thought.
[already this is terrible, but just write. just write just write]
He walked slowly up the driveway, catching his breath while inspecting the car. “Out of state plates,” he thought. “Who could this be?”
[don’t write as though you’re trying to write a novel, write as though you’re telling a story]
“Dad?” Sebastian said as he entered.
[just write. it’s ok if it’s terrible, just write]
There was a plate with a half-eaten sandwich on the table, a walker in the corner.
“Hello?” A female voice came from the back of the house. He heard footsteps approaching.
He met a woman dressed like a nurse, short, perhaps in her thirties, heavy but not fat. She looked like she had the strength a nurse would need to move patients.
“I’m Andrea, the caregiver.” She extended her hand with a smile. “You look just like him – you must be Sebastian.”
“Nice to meet you. What happened with my father?” he asked. He moved as to motion her back to where his father was. She let him pass but followed closely, checking the sound of her steps and the volume of her voice.
“He had a fall two weeks ago – banged his knee up pretty badly, had a slight fracture in his wrist and shoulder,” she said.
Sebastian stopped at the entrance to the bedroom. His father was asleep. There was a wheelchair next to the bed.
Andrea whispered, “He’s better, but it will take some time. He doesn’t have much use of the right side of his body.”
Sebastian looked at his father, without approaching, while she looked up at him. “How long will he be asleep?” he whispered as he started walking back to the kitchen.
“Usually about an hour or two,” she said, following. “He had a pretty strenuous therapy session this morning. We’re working on regaining movement and strength, and I try to limit the discomfort but going through the range of motion is going to hurt for a while.”
[just write. some days will be ok, others will be terrible. just keep writing]
They sat at the kitchen table. She finished her sandwich while he made one of his own.
[even if it starts off bad, just keep going. you won’t be good until you’re terrible for a long time. don’t worry, this won’t happen in a week or a month or a year. be patient]
“Your father’s been expecting you. He said you’ve been travelling the last few months?” she asked.
“I’ve been on a research team in Antarctica. We’re doing seismic testing of the glaciers, trying to find the fissures most likely to break and dump a massive amount of ice into the ocean. If we know that, we’ll know where to establish other research facilities to be near the fissures, and the underlying ice, but not on them. When the glaciers break off, we can study the underlying strata of ice to learn about historical climate, but not if we’re sitting on a glacier when it breaks off into the sea.”
“Sounds cold,” she said, smiling. “I’ll stick with North Carolina weather.”
“Where was he when he fell?” he asked. “Do you know if he called for help, or if somebody found him and did that?”
“He was at the park, and when he fell some people called for an ambulance and helped him get to the parking lot. It was too bad that he fell on the paved path instead of the grass, but at least there were others nearby to help.”
“What happened to his car?”
“It’s still near the park. He said you’d be some soon enough and there was no risk of it being towed, so he just left it there.”
[just keep writing. just keep writing]
“How long was he in the hospital?” he asked.
“Two nights, and I got him back here when he was discharged. The first few nights were pretty rough, and he was pretty heavily medicated, but the pain is decreasing and so are his meds, and he’s able to move around a bit better each day.” She walked to the sink and washed her dish while he sat at the table.
[this day next year you’ll be much better than now. just keep working]
“Something strange happened the other day,” she said, her back to him as she stood at the sink. “Two men came by asking about you. They said they were college friends, but I got a real negative vibe from them. I told them you were out of the country and your father didn’t know when you’d return.”
“What else did they say,” Sebastian asked.
“They asked if they could come in, but I told them your father was asleep and I didn’t want to risk waking him. I asked for their names and a way to reach them. They both hesitated, then one introduced them both as Jake and James and said he’d just come back another time. As they left, one pulled keys from his pocket but they didn’t drive up. I got the sense they’d parked down the street. But that’s all I know.” she said.
“Strange,” he said pensively. “Hey, if I can get Dad’s keys I’ll go grab his car.”
She handed him keys from the counter and told him where it was parked.
“Thanks,” he said. “Maybe when I’m back he’ll be awake.”
When Sebastian left, he walked with purpose but he didn’t run. “Who were those two men?” he thought. “And why would they be looking for me?” He thought back to the time between work trips, when he’d been home for six weeks. He couldn’t remember any interactions that would have involved anyone like that. He dismissed it from his mind and kept walking.
When he got to the park he spotted his father’s car right away. As he approached he saw a ticket on the windshield, but it turned out to be a note.
[ok, 2 hours. good job – even if it’s not great, you have to put in the work. even if the work itself is undirected and feels haphazard. it won’t be a straight line, and you need to go through this stage]